SHOULD WE KEEP IT TO OURSELVES Part II

 Last week I explained how my mother took care of my diet and other needs when I was diagnosed with diabetes at age 5.  The doctors in the 1940's stated to my parents ,


"She should learn all about this so she can take care of herself and you should start  now."


"WHAT?  She's FIVE YEARS OLD!"


My mother and father were both involved but later in life it was my Mom who told me of all the drama that occurred with  my diagnosis.

After doing all the reading the physicians advised and getting other books from the library and researching the best she could in that day with less than a high school education, Mom announced (she told me), 

"We are not going to have different foods for one person in the house.  This diet looks healthy and  is going to be for everyone. "

Mom also stated to the physicians when they did the scare tactics; i.e. loss of legs, blindness, no hope for marriage and children....that she had now closed all the books.  She said we'd live a healthy life, all of us and just do the best we could.  Sometimes the medical community still uses scare tactics.  I'll talk about that at another time.  

Later when it was suggested by our physician that I go to a diabetic camp and diabetic meetings in pre-teen years my mother said,

"She doesn't have to go to a diabetic camp.  WE'LL go camping.  And we did.  Years later, I even went camping on my honeymoon since it was a remembered delightful experience that carried me through a healthy and happy childhood.  I continued camping when our son came along.

That was really very cute, my mother saying and doing that.  Of course the doctor thought  my being with other diabetics would be helpful but it was obvious Mom didn't think so.  She didn't want me to think that diabetes was such a big deal it had to be treated differently .  

Do I think she was right about that?  .  I've heard good things about getting children together so they feel they're not alone with their challenges.  However, not identifying with a particular group  apparently worked for me.  There was a time about 15 years ago when I realized I was cheating myself by not 'keeping in the loop'.  That was my own fault.  See ....I CAN ALWAYS CHANGE MY MIND, I'M A GROWNUP.
I had been doing fairly well for more than 50 years so never bothered to check out new resources.  "Fairly well for fifty years" was good but not great.  Some visual problems were cropping up and I blame myself completely for 'not bothering' to look into more research. . I could have been keeping my blood sugars lower but I was feeling well and was 'just living my life'.   I had wonderful doctors in New York City but that is another story. 

I believe for me, in the days I was diagnosed, my mother made a good decision for me and for the family.  She did everything she could to make my childhood as normal as possible and I still feel that way.  In the future I'll tell you about a friend who said to me recently, 

"I didn't know you had so many problems".


Neither did I!


Isn't that what Mom's mission was all about?


Diabetes does not define who you are but once you're a 'grownup' you  must keep up to date.   Remember, we're the one in charge now.  We can find out everything and can decide for ourselves if we wish to do it or not.  But...for heavens sake, check it out!  

Authors note-  I was so glad to thank my parents before they died, for all the work and love and care they gave me.  It must have been an impossibly difficult time for them when I was a child in the 1940's and 50's. 

See Part III next Thursday, 1/6/11