Thursday, December 23, 2010

SHOULD WE KEEP IT TO OURSELVES? Part I

Having a diagnosis of diabetes in the 1940's was not a usual occurrence in a neighborhood for a five year old little girl.   It was also difficult for my parents. They talked with others about it  as well as the physicians and few medical people who were  available at that time.  Remember, back then there weren't support groups as there are today. Of course the school, teachers and people who would have to be told I was a diabetic because as a young child, I would not have recognized the symptoms of a low blood sugar or other problems.  

Occasionally around family members or people who knew  of my diabetes, my mother would have to defend an action.


"Oh can she eat that?  I thought she was a diabetic!"
  
My smart mother would  reply,


"I take care of her diet, thank you."

As I got older  I began to  notice my life was much more normal around people who did not know I was a diabetic.  So in the course of my many years of taking care of myself as I grew up, I just didn't bother mentioning this to others.  


Have you noticed when someone 'announces' they are on a diet, or a vegan, or eating just cabbage for 2 weeks or pregnant or  anything else they  might be doing, everyone has something to say about it!?  Well, I think I understood that very early on and handled it this way.


1.  When I was a teenager and attended parties, I would put cake, ice cream   or whatever everyone else was taking, onto my plate.  I would eat what I knew I could have and then just walk around and leave my plate somewhere with the leftovers on it.  No one noticed.   If I had gone to the garbage and thrown the leftovers in, someone would have said something.  


2.  I had the good fortune at age 14 (the tough teen years for ANYONE )when the diet or sugarless sodas came out.  Then I could 'be on a diet'.  Neat.  


3.  I often hear people explaining to their hostesses or hosts or just anyone why they can't eat something.  Why does that matter? 

Mom said "when  someone offers you something you can't eat  just say, 


No thank you." 

  She was so wise.

Occasionally someone who knows I have diabetes will be passing food around and when they come to me, instead of allowing ME the option to refuse, says


"Oh, you can't eat that"  


Irritating.  I did have to train a few friends to allow me (or anyone else) to make their own decisions. 


I believe I was basically  successful with keeping my own council.  My life was peaceful regarding what people thought or didn't think about my diabetes.  Most never knew.  It was an inner satisfaction when forever friends  I had known for more than 40 years said,


"We never knew you were a diabetic!  We just thought you were on a diet!"


When another forever friend was diagnosed with diabetes and bemoaning the fact, I could help her  in a very positive way .  She was dumbfounded when I  said I was also a diabetic. and I had been for more than 50 YEARS!   She is doing great with  encouragement and was truly shocked that she had never known.  


Think about why someone announces they are diabetic.  Is it because they feel sorry for themselves  or is  it a sense of pride, or is it who they have become?



This is not about HIDING something about oneself.  It's about not letting anything you live with; define you.    Diabetes is what you take care of and do.  It is NOT WHO YOU ARE!

What anyone does about their diagnosis of anything, is up to them.  For me, aside from  this blog which I hope may help someone else, I live my life  taking care of myself and with a mission of doing good works.  I also have  many passions and interests and exciting things to discuss and do  besides MY DIABETES.


What do YOU think?

Part II of this discussion next week.

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