Having a diagnosis of diabetes in the 1940's was not a usual occurrence in a neighborhood for a five year old little girl. It was also difficult for my parents. They talked with others about it as well as the physicians and few medical people who were available at that time. Remember, back then there weren't support groups as there are today. Of course the school, teachers and people who would have to be told I was a diabetic because as a young child, I would not have recognized the symptoms of a low blood sugar or other problems.
Occasionally around family members or people who knew of my diabetes, my mother would have to defend an action.
"Oh can she eat that? I thought she was a diabetic!"
My smart mother would reply,
"I take care of her diet, thank you."
As I got older I began to notice my life was much more normal around people who did not know I was a diabetic. So in the course of my many years of taking care of myself as I grew up, I just didn't bother mentioning this to others.
Have you noticed when someone 'announces' they are on a diet, or a vegan, or eating just cabbage for 2 weeks or pregnant or anything else they might be doing, everyone has something to say about it!? Well, I think I understood that very early on and handled it this way.
1. When I was a teenager and attended parties, I would put cake, ice cream or whatever everyone else was taking, onto my plate. I would eat what I knew I could have and then just walk around and leave my plate somewhere with the leftovers on it. No one noticed. If I had gone to the garbage and thrown the leftovers in, someone would have said something.
2. I had the good fortune at age 14 (the tough teen years for ANYONE )when the diet or sugarless sodas came out. Then I could 'be on a diet'. Neat.
3. I often hear people explaining to their hostesses or hosts or just anyone why they can't eat something. Why does that matter?
Mom said "when someone offers you something you can't eat just say,
No thank you."
She was so wise.
Occasionally someone who knows I have diabetes will be passing food around and when they come to me, instead of allowing ME the option to refuse, says
"Oh, you can't eat that"
Irritating. I did have to train a few friends to allow me (or anyone else) to make their own decisions.
I believe I was basically successful with keeping my own council. My life was peaceful regarding what people thought or didn't think about my diabetes. Most never knew. It was an inner satisfaction when forever friends I had known for more than 40 years said,
"We never knew you were a diabetic! We just thought you were on a diet!"
When another forever friend was diagnosed with diabetes and bemoaning the fact, I could help her in a very positive way . She was dumbfounded when I said I was also a diabetic. and I had been for more than 50 YEARS! She is doing great with encouragement and was truly shocked that she had never known.
Think about why someone announces they are diabetic. Is it because they feel sorry for themselves or is it a sense of pride, or is it who they have become?
This is not about HIDING something about oneself. It's about not letting anything you live with; define you. Diabetes is what you take care of and do. It is NOT WHO YOU ARE!
What anyone does about their diagnosis of anything, is up to them. For me, aside from this blog which I hope may help someone else, I live my life taking care of myself and with a mission of doing good works. I also have many passions and interests and exciting things to discuss and do besides MY DIABETES.
What do YOU think?
Part II of this discussion next week.
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